Updates

so after talking to jessica i realized i handt given this blog any attention. as i sit here in my room at 10 40 i am just winding down and letting my brain go into relax mode for once. the past couple of months have been quite hectic. i have taken on so much more responsibility at work and am taking a class. i want to get alot of leadership experience and get the most out of my ten months and work myself to the bone to get ready for the world after city year. this has been the longest few weeks of my life and they are certainly going to get worse with 100 hours of power coming up where we serve for 100 hours straight, to our spring break camp which i signed on to help direct, to my saturdays doing city heroes with our high schoolers. i dont know what i was thinking. i just want to grow and mature and actually learn how to time manage. you would think i had learned this in high school and in college but it never really plays out until after that and then you realize you learned nothing at all.

i also realized how much i missed my family. while aisha lives here in the city i rarely see her becasue she works so much and i work alot too. matt just signed his life away for the next four years and everyone else is off in their respective places living their lives. but thats what happens with such a large family. they all spread out. with so any changes going on, with me getting a new roomate soon and figuring out my next year i have alot on my plate but im looking forward to see what is out there. im not afraid anymore. im actually getting excited to see what is in store. my next goal is on a much smaller scale. goal number one that i am hoping to get done: get batteries to look at my pictures from nye! haha

NEw thoughts on where i am

So after returning from a nice visit at home ive come back to chicago with alot on my mind and on my plate. i need to figure out what to do to finish school which is harder than it seems. it takes alot to decide the future so thats rough. its all about whats the best, whats reasonable and will fit within my plans for next year. i love my job. ive already applied early to come back next year to have my own team at a school, hopefully the one im at already but wherever im needed works for me too. i think its going to be such a great experience for me becasue everything that im learning so far and have yet to learn is only going to prepare me for wbhatever i do down the road. my goals as of today are: to do one more year while doing the whole grad school thing or going to grad school after i finish up next year; find a job within heartland alliance or another non proft that deals with immigration; maybe getting into law somehow. big hopes, big dreams but if i claim it, its mine. so tomorrow i may want to run off and join the circus. i mean it was in town at the united center so i had my chance haha.

i also wish i could be happy in all regards of my life for once. i realized that everything im thought was semi perfect is not. its hard work to be happpy within relationships whether that be in friendships or dating someone and even within you family.its been a very eye opening experience within all of those relationships an i have found that there are alot of things im not happy with. alot of things im not happy with withing myself that i need to figure out. it sucks but hey thats all about growing. you cannot be a healthy develping person if you dont realize things that need to change around you and within you.l im at that phase but i kind of wish i werent. makes me miss when i didnt have to worry about alot of things and when my only concern was studying for a test and running fast in a race. everything else was less important to me. now i guess i have to be a grown up and face....reality. ew

THANKSGIVING

so glad that i go home for thanksgiving. thats all

First Attempt

So this is my first attempt at this whole blogging nonsense. its a good way to keep track of what i do this year. since ive started working with city year i think its good for me to keep track of how things go throughout the year. a live journal i guess. its almost time for thanksgiving and im wrapping up my day hoping not to pass out. i hate that am 23 yet i feel like im 57. ugh i miss all nighters, early mornings, sports practices and skipping classes. the good ole days...